The other night on the way to yoga, I was thinking about the american dream. Now, that may seem like a weird thing to think about but when you walk a lot by yourself, you have a lot of time to think. I walk a lot, and at night, I won't wear my headphones for safety issues, so the only thing I have to listen to is my own thoughts.
Anyways, the reason that this ran through my mind was because I was thinking about the ways I have changed. I know that I have changed as a result of this trip but as of yet, I haven't been able to put into words any actual changes, it's just a feeling I have. So I was thinking about my changing self when I realized at least one way I have changed. I am now much more able to see the good of the United States. I have never been particularly patriotic and in fact, I have never really liked being an American. Now while that hasn't completely changed, I am starting to see what it is that the american dream represents for the rest of the world. I'm not saying I understand what it is like to be living in poverty in a third world country or anything so absurd, because I never can but I have met people here who idolize the United States. They see it as a completely magical place. They want to travel there more than any where else in the world and this isn't just one person, I have met several people with these dreams.
There is definitely something to believing you can do anything and that is something I truly believe, that with proper use of resources and enough determination, you can do anything. However, I am actually starting to realize how american I really am in believing that. It seems, that in the rest of the world, you can't just do things because you want. Americans have it easy and I have also realized, quite a while ago actually, how much Americans just do what they want when they want because they want it with no real thought to anything else. It was never weird for me to look at someone in whatever situation they were in and think that if they wanted to change it, they could, but then I met my maid here. She's the third generation of her family to clean this apartment building and that astounds me, how many third generation of any type of worker do we have in the US anymore? It is much more common that a child will reject the family business and do what their heart desires.
I don't know why I was thinking about this. But it's making me realize how american my ideals and my approach to life are. I do what I want because I want it, I have a enlarged sense of individuality (for which I thank my mother) and I have a hard time understanding a lifestyle outside of grow up, go to college, get degree, get a job and there's life. I don't know what this means for me, it was just something I was thinking about.
Also, I wrote this post yesterday, and never really proofed it, so if it seems illogical or weird, just accept it and love me anyways. Also, today when the USA lost against Ghana in the world cup, I felt something weird, I think it was American pride. I wanted use to win or at least make it farther, I thought we should have beat Ghana and I felt sad when we lost. It is not only weird for me to feel emotion over a loss in sports much less watch a game of something, but to feel pride in my country and care whether or not we do well is just something new for me.
Anyways, I have to go to dinner now.
2 weeks and counting